


Miscommunication

by NeedMoreCoffee



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Malec, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-03
Updated: 2016-08-03
Packaged: 2018-07-29 03:36:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7668601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeedMoreCoffee/pseuds/NeedMoreCoffee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Something is bothering Alec about his relationship with Magnus, something that leads to a misunderstanding. Short malec one shot.<br/>WARNING! Involves spoilers for those who haven't read the books yet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Miscommunication

Alec Lightwood had always had a 'close enough' to a simple life considering what he was. His family was wealthy and he had always thought that as long he stuck to their principles, that were; sticking to the rules, he’d be okay. It was supposed to be that simple, and if anyone had told Alec that one day all this would change, he wouldn’t have believed it.

Now, as he brushes his hair away from his face he realizes that he had been very wrong. He is in Magnus’ apartment, crouched up on one of the large furniture, arms wrapped around one leg as he continuously stares at the floor, as if his life depends on it. He doesn’t notice it when Magnus enters, nor does he look up when he hears a thump, too lost in thought. Alec bites down on the thumb that has been resting on the edge of his mouth for the last hour, hard enough that it’s only slightly painful.  Things are okay for him, really. Valentine is dead, the whole Jace and Clary drama is has been dealt with and things seem to be settling into the same old. He has friends now, and slowly both he and his family is recovering from Max's death. Things were supposed to feel better now, and still here he was, bitter thoughts constantly crawling in the back of his mind. Finally he notices Magnus on the other side of the room.

Catlike eyes stare almost bemusedly at him; his lips perched up in a smirk.

“What?” Alec asks.

“You were so lost in thought I didn’t really know if I should have announced my presence in the room” Magnus explains, voice thick with humour.

Alec’s gaze drops, he can’t really think of anything to say to Magnus.

The amusement in Magnus’ voice drops as well and turns gentle for his next question. “What were you thinking about?”

Alec doesn’t look up, hating the feeling in the bottom of his stomach.

“Everything that has happened lately” he admits and shrugs.

Magnus’ eyes seem to drop for a second until they dart back up again; he looks as if he wants to say something to comfort Alec. Alec doesn’t quite see why.

“It must be hard, adjusting to all the new things” Magnus finally says, his tone neutral and yet carries a tone of unspoken words. It surprises Alec, usually Magnus doesn’t slip up, he lies as perfectly as he enchants...

 

_There have been certain, troubles in their relationship as of late. Alec agreed to move in with Magnus after the war, something that had in the beginning brought the two even closer. But as always in these things, problems always appear. For Alec it had been the feeling of doubt towards his new lover, because Magnus was so much older than him he found himself more nervous around the other than he should. The warlock had lived for centuries, which meant plenty of time with plenty of lovers. He knew it wasn’t fair to Magnus, but there was little he could do to feel as if he wasn’t just a small part of the Warlock’s long immortal life. He was just another name to the list._

_He knew there was something bothering Magnus as well, and despite having a few guesses, he didn’t really know the entirety of it._

 

Alec nods his head in agreement and once again doesn’t quite know what to say, he wonders if perhaps his voice has finally abandoned him.

With a sigh Magnus rises from his seat and spins around to leave the room, a look of weariness on his face. “I’m getting something to drink” he mutters.

The lie is so stupidly obvious Alec decides he has to speak. “Usually when you want to get a drink you make it appear in your hand”

Magnus stops in his trace and seems to almost freeze in the spot, as if Alec has said something horrible to him.

It’s Alec’s turn to sigh. “Magnus” he says gently, because the last thing he wants to do is argue.

The warlock turns his head toward Alec, his lips closed shut and his eyes half shut, almost as if he is expecting a scolding for trying to leave the room.

“I think we should talk” Alec admits, his blue eyes trying to catch the others, Magnus’ eyes drop.

“About what?”

The whole situation is strange to Alec. Magnus isn’t usually so drawn back, his posture isn’t as glamorous and he almost seems to be slouching.

“Did I do something wrong?” Alec pushes himself up and he swears the warlock must have jumped a little. He tries not to look hurt, but realizes Magnus must have seen it because he suddenly spins around to look at Alec, his gaze soft and warm.

“Of course not” he reassures Alec, and he almost believes him.

“Then what is this?” Alec continues to interrogate. “Why are we like this?” he keeps his voice calm, but can’t help to let a little desperation escape.

Magnus looks as if he doesn’t want to speak, but then he does and Alec wonders if perhaps he should have just kept his mouth shut.

“Alec” The stern look and slight tilt of the head reminds Alec a little of his mother when she would try to explain to Alec that whatever he had done was wrong and that he shouldn’t have done it. He swallows nervously.

“I know there are things that have been on your mind for a while now, about me and…” Magnus’s pauses,

Alec decides he defiantly shouldn’t have brought this up.

“us” The warlock takes a step closer and his eyes seem to grow colder by the minute. “And I want you to know that it’s not your fault, honestly I just want the best for you”

Alec feels nauseous, the look on Magnus’ face is so unfamiliar and it doesn’t suit him at all.

“You should know that you have made me very happy in the short time we’ve had together, it’s a lie if I say it didn’t matter to me”

Alec was confused. _What is this is he dying or something?_ But Magnus couldn’t die, at least not out of nowhere like this.

“Perhaps this is the inevitable circle of being immortal” a bitter smile crosses his face and he doesn’t come any closer to Alec now. “But that’s not your fault, nor is it anyone else’s.”

Silence fills the air around them and Alec realizes he has finished, but he remains mute.

“Will you say something?” Magnus tilts his head again, but his eyes are still cold. For a second they seem to slip away from the cold gaze and Alec thinks that for just a moment he can see the weariness there, suddenly Magnus seem so much older than what his appearances reveal.

Alec takes a step closer, carefully because he doesn’t want Magnus to jump back again. He repeats the action until he has reached Magnus. Two hands move up to cup the warlock’s face.

Magnus seem almost astonished and he doesn’t say anything, only watches Alec carefully.

Alec moves his thumb as gently as possible across Magnus’ cheek, and then slips the hand behind his neck. The other hand remains ever so softly on the other side of the smaller man’s face, and then without a warning, Alec presses his lips against Magnus’.

It’s not like it’s new to kiss Magnus, they’ve kissed many times before, much more involved than this. But at the same time it feels entirely now, as if it’s the first time Alec truly sees Magnus. The kiss is gentle and careful. At first Magnus doesn’t respond, but then his hand moves to tangle itself in Alec’s hair and he moves his lips back against Alec’s.

Any trouble seem to disappear in their world as the kiss continues; only the ignition of whatever new sensation has sparked between them seem to matter. Hands slowly begin to search for more contact; Alec wraps his around the smaller, and Magnus has his resting on each of Alec’s shoulder blades, connecting them behind his neck.

Eventually they pull apart for air and only then does Alec see what Magnus had meant before and even if the realization horrors him, he understands the miscommunication that must have started it.

“Were you trying to break up with me?” he says and continues to hold onto the other, afraid he might still leave.

Magnus looks like a cat that has just been caught ripping apart its owner’s most beloved possession.

“I thought” he starts and then pauses, lips twitching in a regretting expression. “I thought that might have been what you wanted to say... clearly I was wrong”

Alec frowns.

“Do you want to break up with me?”

“Of course not” Magnus quickly reassures him.

“Did you think I wanted to break up?”

Magnus nods carefully and Alec can’t deny that his heart breaks a little at the look on his lover’s face.

He wonders if he should let the other go, but then decides against it. Instead he pulls Magnus along to come sit next to him.

“Explain” he says gently when they’re seated.

Magnus, for the first time probably since they met looks confused. Alec decides it’s adorable.

“As you know, I am very old” he starts, and let’s his gaze focus on his own hands. “I have had many lovers and honestly not enough relationships.” He sighs. “I am very used to one night stands and breaks up, on my behalf. Being broken however, not so much” it’s a bitter smile that shapes his lips at the unspoken name. _Camille._  “I supposed I was afraid you didn’t want this” Alec can’t quite tell if Magnus means himself or the relationship.

It’s a rare sight, to see Magnus take the role Alec so often carries. Showing fear never seemed to be something Magnus did, not until today anyway.

“Honestly” Alec finally speaks. “I was worried that I wouldn’t be enough. You always seem so confident and aware of yourself, you have probably loved more times than ever I will. But I didn’t consider the fact that you’ve probably been hurt just as much, and that makes it harder to want to love again. I remember what you said a long time ago, about the walls you put around yourself, you said I unlocked something.” He pauses, relieved to see that Magnus is looking up at him now. “I guess it’s just natural to me to overthink things, but now that I look at you I realize that you love better than anyone I have ever met, because every time, you give a little piece of your heart, until there’s nothing left to give. Maybe that’s why I can look into your eyes and look behind the mask you created for yourself" his hands find Magnus' hands. "I love you Magnus" he finally says, finding that for the first time in his life he doesn't sound utterly stupid while talking about his feelings. 

At first Magnus says nothing, his cold eyes melted into something warm. "Alexander..." he whispers, a smile now shaping his lips. "This is, unexpected to say the least.." 

Alec wonders if maybe he spoke too soon, after all, neither of them had actually ever said those words. He opens his mouth to say something, but Magnus beats him to it.

"I love you too" the warlock's voice makes his heart skip a beat and he finds he needs to look away for a second. Outside the sun is setting, covering the room in orange and yellow lights, Alec finds himself thinking of Clary for a split second. She would have been able to capture this moment perfectly in her drawings...

The feel of Magnus' hands cupping his face pulls him back into the moment. Now Magnus' eyes almost seem to be on fire, the light in the room making them look almost orange.

"Alec?" Magnus whispers, too lost in Alec to seem to notice anything else. 

"hmm?" he asks, eyes half closed.

"Care to join me in our bedroom?" The question comes out in a half suggestive - half gentle voice. Alec can do nothing but nod before he is pulled along by Magnus, towards their bedroom. The thought never really stopped making him feel like a giggly teenager; "their" bedroom.

There is nothing more to be said as the door closes behind them and Magnus pushes Alec down into the bed, the beautiful colors of the sunset forgotten in the following warmth. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to everyone for the kudos! This gives me more confidence to continue writing! I won't write anymore on this piece, but I might write more malec later on~  
> Thanks for reading, hopefully you enjoyed! Comments and Kudos are appreciated.


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